Ponder This

August 22, 2014

Daddy hurt Momma

Filed under: Living a Healthy Lifestyle — by ReidmillerWrites @ 9:28

Daddy hurt my Momma and is in jail. Momma is in the hospital. I heard people whispering and I was hiding so I could hear what they were saying. I don’t know why Daddy hurts Momma. It must be because he drinks. Why does Daddy drink? Why does he hurt my Momma?

For anyone following my blog, I have been writing from a child’s perspective when one parents drinks and physically abuses the other parent. The child can’t sleep, can’t stay awake in school, fails to learn and the child suffers but no one speaks up for the child. The teachers, the school nurse and the next door neighbor know but do not say anything. The non drinking parent is an enabler and is just as guilty as the drunk.

Addiction causes horrific consequences. This story is about a father than drinks, but there are parents using drugs and neglecting their children. I will continue to share stories and facts about addiction because someone has to speak up for the children of drug addicts and drunks.

August 20, 2014

Daddy drinks and Momma cries

Filed under: Living a Healthy Lifestyle — by ReidmillerWrites @ 9:28

Addiction from a child’s point of view:

I am so confused. I am a little girl but I think drinking is bad. Daddy is meaner when he drinks. Sometimes Daddy stays home from work because he is sick. I hear Momma call his boss and she always says he has a stomach problem. I ask Momma if I can stay home with Daddy I am so tired. She said I have to go to school and she has to go to work.

She is putting lots of makeup on her face. I bet she is trying to hide the bruises on her face where Daddy hits her. I catch the bus and when I get to school I ask to go the nurse’s office but my teacher said no, I’m missing too much class time. I try to pay attention but I don’t feel good. I probably have what Daddy has, Momma said he had a stomach problem.

When my bus stops in front of my house, Momma’s car isn’t in the driveway but Daddy’s is.. Mrs. Jones, the lady next door is standing in my driveway. She said Momma called her and asked her to watch me until she gets home. I play in Mrs. Jones yard, she doesn’t tell me why I can’t go home since my Daddy is there. When Momma comes home she tells me to say goodbye to Mrs. Jones and come home. I wonder what it will be like tonight?

 

August 19, 2014

My Daddy hits my Momma

Filed under: Living a Healthy Lifestyle — by ReidmillerWrites @ 9:28

Addiction from a child’s perspective

Daddy hit Momma again. I was sleepy at school and asked my teacher if I could go see the nurse. I sleep on the cot in the nurses office until she woke me to tell me it was time to catch the school bus. I must have slept all day. When I get off the bus I see Momma and Daddy’s cars. I open the door so it doesn’t make any noise. I’m afraid. I hear Momma and Daddy laughing in the kitchen.

Momma sees me and tells me to come have a snack. She said the nurse called her. She’s sorry I didn’t feel good. No one says anything about Daddy’s drinking or hitting Momma last night.

I play outside until dinner time then I play in my room. I go to bed and in the middle of the night I hear yelling. Momma is yelling at Daddy that he promised he was going to stop drinking. He tells her to shut up and says some bad words. I can’t sleep again. I’m so tired. I don’t understand why Daddy drinks and breaks promises to Momma. I know he is hitting her but this time I don’t go check. I put my pillow over my ear but don’t sleep. When I get to school I go back to the nurse again. I can’t keep my eyes open at school. I am so tired. Why does Daddy keep hitting Momma? Why does he drink that smelly stuff? My teachers and the nurse don’t ask me why I’m so tired. Momma keeps telling me it’s our secret and it is a game they play and I can’t tell anyone.

August 15, 2014

Daddy is drinking and Mommy is mad

Filed under: Living a Healthy Lifestyle — by ReidmillerWrites @ 9:28

How a child views your drinking……

Daddy is sleeping late today because it is Saturday, his day off. I can’t wait for him to see my dance costume. Mommy says I can’t wake him up though, I have to wait and for me to go outside and play.

I hear Daddy coming down the hall and I run to him, Daddy are you ready to see me dance. He says he has a headache and doesn’t feel good. He needs some coffee and he will feel better. Mommy is in the kitchen and the sink makes that gurgle sound again. She tells Daddy he needs to fix it. He yells he will do it tomorrow. He is going to a football game today with friends.

I run into the room and ask Daddy if he has time to see me dance before he has to leave and he says sure. I run and get dressed in my tutu. I yell for Daddy to come watch me and then I start dancing. He isn’t watching me, he is rubbing his head and Mommy is yelling at him. He can’t go to the game, he needs to do stuff around the house.

Daddy jumps up from the chair, grabs his keys and runs out the door and slams it shut. Mommy starts crying. I don’t know what to do, run after Daddy or make Mommy feel better. I go to Mommy and tell her I’m sorry and ask why Daddy is like that. She says he loves me, he works hard and just needs time with his friends. We spend the day together, Mommy and me. I don’t see Daddy before I go to bed.

August 13, 2014

Why do you drink?

Filed under: Living a Healthy Lifestyle — by ReidmillerWrites @ 9:28

You drink because the alcohol makes you feel good. It helps you forget your problems. You suffer from chronic pain and drinking dulls it. Your job is stressful so stopping and having a few drinks after work calms you down. You are depressed, feeling anxious, nervous, worried, sad, overwhelmed, and on and on.

Your reason for drinking keeps you going back for more. If you stop what will happen? The stress returns, the pain returns or your emotions bounce back to depression, nervousness and panic.

More people manage to deal with all of these reasons without drinking than those you try to self-medicate, which means their is hope. You not only have the ability to stop drinking with rehab, but you learn how to manage your triggers.

August 12, 2014

Why People Can’t Stop Using Drugs Without Help

Filed under: Living a Healthy Lifestyle — by ReidmillerWrites @ 9:28

How many times do people experiment with drugs and believe they can stop when they want? Society believes these people lack willpower and self-control. The saddest part of that thinking causes people to not seek treatment. They believe they are weak and there is no hope. So they try to quit, they really do. They tell themselves and their loved ones they want to quit and this was their last fix.

They may last a day, a week or even longer, but something happens and they go back to drinking, injecting or snorting. Why?

1. The cravings are too strong and they believe their only release from the tremors, hallucinations, paranoia, severe headaches and other side effects is to start using again and they are right. The minute they are high the symptoms go away.

2. They manage to overcome the withdrawal symptoms but run into their drug buddy and peer pressure leads them back to using.

You are out of control and need help.

August 11, 2014

You want to quit drinking

Filed under: Living a Healthy Lifestyle — by ReidmillerWrites @ 9:28

You have headache, you argued with your boss or your spouse or your parents about your drinking. You want to stop, you promise it almost everyday and sometimes you really try to stop. You quit for almost a month one time, but started drinking again.

You keep repeating the cycle, you start missing work or coming in late. You miss classes at school or fail to turn in your assignment. You passed out and your baby is crying in the next room or your toddler is entertaining himself or herself. You drive while intoxicated because you have control and can manage driving home. These dangerous behaviors sometimes helps motivate people to stop drinking, but they start drinking again.

Your spouse packs up the children and they move out. You are fired from your job. You swerve to miss an oncoming car and hit a tree instead. You are out of control and losing everything. All because you are an alcoholic. You are not a bad person, you are an alcoholic and you need help.

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